Listening: Beverly Hills by Weezer

Reading (perhaps quality): I'm Not the New Me by Wendy McClure.

Reading (definitely pulp): Nothing.

Drinking: Water, baby.

August 26, 2005
9:15 pm

From an evening conversation with my dad, me mentioning I'm interested in test driving some scooters.

Dad: "You know, with a motorcycle its not a matter of if but when
you'll get hurt."
Me: "I know, Dad."
Dad: "You'd be a lot safer in a car with all that metal around you."
Me: "Yes, Dad."
Dad: "Or in a Humvee - those things are huge."
Me: "Well..."
Dad: "Perhaps a Patton Tank. I think that might make me feel you were safe."
Me: "I could always move into an underground bomb shelter and never leave."
Dad: "Sounds good to me."

I'm lucky in my family and friends. I know I've said it a million times but it doesn't make it any less true.

Through breakups and dramas and very real traumas, well, if
I've ever been alone I knew it wasn't because I didn't have a whole
troop of people willing to offer support and care and love.

But as the people who deal with the aftermath they do want me to be safe and to protect me from what looks like certain harm. If there's a lesson they've learned and seen me repeatedly *not* learn they want to pass it on. They want to pass it on whether or not I'm
particularly interested in hearing it.

Beley and I, talking about a not-to-be-named guy.

Beley: "That's all nice, but he's not for you"
Me: "But we get along well, he says he really likes me, and..."
Beley: "Babe he's young and cute and does like you but you two really wouldn't work."
Me: "But..."
Beley: "Sorry, you just can't have him."

Advice giving is a tricky game and as someone who's spent most of her life with a big "the advice giver is IN" sign on, well I'm trying to get out of it. Even when asked for its often not really wanted, and there tend to be more things that can go wrong with it than can go
right. So I try to save it for about-to-hit-an-iceberg situations, deliver it once, offer support no matter what their decision, and then get the hell out of the way.

But I appreciate these folks' willingness to offer some perspective
and hard won lessons to me. I completely trust they have my health and heart and mind and spirit in mind when they give me perspective on what I should be doing. Doesn't mean I take it, but I appreciate the genorosity with which its given.

Doing (life and related tasks): Trying to deal with humid DC weather

Doing (crafty stuff): Lots of embroidery.

Wanting: A good night's sleep - have been dealing with some weird soreness in my back.

Anticipating: Cooler weather. Sorry, its boring but true.